Eating Potato Chips and Other Extreme Sports
by SoSaysL
Summary: When she's shot from the sky and separated from the Flock, Max finds herself caught in the middle of the Kira case. She quickly learns that surviving is more complicated than it seems in this deadly game, and that nothing and no one are quite what they seem to be.
1. Look what Misa-misa found!

**[a/n]** the idea wouldn't go away, even though it's completely different than what I usually write. So here you have a DN/Maximum Ride crossover in which Max is her gloriously sarcastic, kick-butt self. How will she fit into the world of Death Note?

**Chapter 1: Look what Misa-misa found!**

"Just because I can't fly doesn't mean I can't kill you!" I screamed harshly into the empty air, not caring that the guy with the sniper was probably going to find me and finish me off.

So much had happened. I'd been chilling with the Flock, and everything was all right as we flew off into the sunset… Just kidding. You know enough about me to know that I don't fly into the sunset.

No, instead I get shot by some kind of evil sniper, almost _fall to my death,_ on top of it all I discover that my wing's been shot through and my arm's practically broken. And what's happened to the Flock? Why didn't Fang come when I plummeted like a rock towards almost certain doom? Did the sniper get them? And ouch, my wing actually has a _hole_ in it.

Not that I'm going to whine about it. I'm the strongest, and that's why I'm the leader of the Flock. I'll find them, no matter what it takes. Although right now I'm barely in any shape to move.

"LOOK WHAT MISA-MISA FOUND!"

I barely propped myself on my elbow, trying to ignore the loud and annoying girl in front of me. "Seriously."

"Misa-misa thinks you're unhappy." The girl mused. She was wearing the most idiotic outfit I could begin to conceive of, filled with ruffs and frills and bows in unnecessary places…and _way_ too much pink. "Misa misa didn't think she would find someone like this while she was on her way to her next modeling tour!"

"I'm guessing you're Misa-misa." I said. "All right."

Time to ditch this strange girl and move out.

"FANG!" I called, as loudly as I could. "FANG!" Coughing, I brought a hand to my mouth. It came away wet with blood.

"My name is Misa." Her mascara-ed blue eyes widened as she knelt next to me. "Are these…_wings?_"

"Yes…uh, no!" I said, becoming panicked as I heard approaching voices and footsteps. What city was this again? "It doesn't matter. Misa, whoever you are, just-"

"Only a few minutes until the paparazzi come." Misa told me, looking behind her. "And did you just cough up _blood_? I'm taking you to my doctor!"

"No, Misa, please-"

"Or else you can be swallowed by the paparazzi!"

"Uh…that's okay…"

I said a silent apology to the Flock as I allowed Misa to drag me to my feet and towards what I assumed was medical help. Not that I like asking people for help, but there is such a thing as death from too much blood loss. Which is _not good at all._

I looked behind me and immediately wished I hadn't. Misa hadn't been kidding about the paparazzi, because there was a mob of reporters that looked ready to tackle us. My paranoia senses were tingling insanely as I limped along after Misa.

"Quick! In here!" Misa yelped, shoving me unceremoniously through some doorway and slamming the door behind us. I do _not_ take kindly to being shoved, so it was all I could do to keep myself from leveling a punch at her face.

"This is Misa-misa's life!" Misa said happily. "Chased everywhere by people who love me _way_ too much! What's your name?"

"Uh…I'm Max." I said grudgingly. "Now. Where were we again? Medical attention?"

"We're in Japan." Misa said uncertainly.

"I mean medical attention."

Right!" Misa chirped.

I could already tell this was going to be a long, long day.


	2. A Matter of Life and Death

**Chapter 2: A Matter of Life and Death**

"The doctor said you're _really_ injured." Misa said worriedly, tapping her manicured fingers against her arm. "Bruises and cuts, and broken bones, and all kinds of bad things."

I'm pretty good at ignoring agonizing pain, but now it crashed into me like a tsunami. My arm literally _burned_ whenever I moved it, and for some reason I felt an odd pain in my chest. Well, at least I wasn't having hallucinations.

"I'm really sorry!" Misa continued. "And your wings…they're so pretty, but…" She reached out towards one of my wings, and instinctively I tucked them towards my back again in a quick flurry of feathers that startled her. Yes, I like my privacy bubble. Especially around girls like Misa. No, the wound wasn't helped by that action _at all._

I remembered the doctor's sharp intake of breath at the sight of my wings. Hopefully _he_ wouldn't go around telling everyone about the miraculous bird-girl.

"Where _are_ we?" I asked sharply.

"I told you! We're in Japan!"

"Nevermind." Dealing with this girl was going to be futile, I could tell.

I gritted my teeth. Being in a well-lit, laboratory-like area, I was actually trying not to freak out and destroy the entire room. Apparently my condition was _serious_, whatever that meant. Well, a lot of things are serious, including being away from the Flock. They need me as much as I need them.

"Yeah, well. As soon as I'm better, I'm out of here." I said.

"But Misa-misa is being so nice to you!" She pouted. "I took you to my doctor and everything! And you're the only other person with wings I've seen since—" Abruptly she fell silent as her gaze darted to meet the floor, which made me _extremely_ suspicious.

"What?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.

"And you _have_ to see my boyfriend!" Misa continued, oblivious to it all.

"No." I told her flatly, giving up on pursuing the mysterious other person with wings that Misa probably hadn't seen. "I _refuse_ to meet your boyfriend."

"But he's a super-super genius! He's the best person ever, and he has the cutest smile, and ohmigosh he's amazing!"

I sighed. In my book, cute smiles and being called a super-super genius by Misa don't get you anywhere. If I hadn't been stuck here, I would've promptly stood and left. "No."

"Hmph. He's on his way."

I shook my head in exasperation. Now I had to meet her stupid boyfriend and listen to her prattle on and on about how wonderful he is. I'd bet that he's just as odd. Remembering that no one was to see my wings, I tucked them even more tightly into my back, wounded as they were, and shrugged on my jacket.

"Oh, look! It's my darling Light!" Misa said, clapping her hands childishly.

I barely had time to think sarcastic thoughts such as _Light? What kind of parent names their kid Light_? before Light himself strode into the room.

He studied me with an unreadable expression, holding two books in his arm and a backpack slung over his shoulder. Immediately, my suspicion doubled at the sight of him. There was something off about this…Light. _Too_ perfect, almost as if there was a world of thought behind those blank eyes.

"Hello. My name's Light Yagami. It's odd, isn't it, to meet someone named _Light._ Yagami, I suppose, is a bit more normal." He said smoothly, extending a hand towards me. I didn't take it. "What's your name?"

"Call me Max." I said distrustfully.

Light's eyes narrowed slightly, as if wondering why I was being so difficult. "Of course, _Max._"

What if he saw my wings? I didn't like this Light guy at all. Misa was all right—at least she meant well—but Light? Who knew what he was thinking?

"So this was the girl I found hurt, lying on the sidewalk! The paparazzi was about to crush her if I hadn't saved her!" Misa said, looking all worried.

"Interesting." Light said in response, shifting the books in his arms. "Well, I've got work to do. I should be on my way—"

"Not so fast." An eerily calm voice said, and I fairly jumped out of my spot as yet another visitor stepped out of the shadows. In a simple white shirt and jeans, he stood and studied us all with dark, owlish eyes.

"OK, that's it!" I said suddenly, feeling thoroughly unsettled. "This is enough. I don't care if my condition is 'serious'. My fl…friends are waiting for me. I've got to go."

"But no!" Misa said hurriedly. "You just met my boyfriend! There's so much more to talk about!"

"Nope." I dismounted from the hospital bed and stalked towards the door.

"I'm afraid you cannot leave." The stranger said quietly, and for some reason this stopped me in my tracks. He turned to Misa, who was clinging to Light's shoulder and giggling. "Who is this, Misa?"

"Oh, she has w-"

I rushed to Misa's side and quickly clapped my hand over Misa's mouth before she could finish the sentence. Hopefully she got the message. "What she _meant_ to say is, I've been waiting for _so_ long, and thank you all, but I really should be going now."

"But who are you?" He enquired curiously.

"Well, I might ask the same of _you_." I returned indignantly. "What's your name?"

"The world of names is a peculiar business." He said, for some reason looking pointedly at Light. Light returned the intense scrutiny with a blank look. The odd stranger continued pensively. "Nowadays I am called Ryuzaki."

"I'm Max." I said brusquely. "Now, why did you get it into your head that I can't leave?"

"You cannot. I believe there is a small chance that you are Kira." As Ryuzaki said this to me, his gaze deliberately wandered to examine Light's reaction. Light simply looked back innocently.

"All right then. I demand answers. Who is this Kira?"

"You don't know?" Misa asked in a small voice. "Who…is Kira?"

Well, the Flock and I aren't exactly learned researchers, if you know what I mean. Our education is spotty at best. So I simply crossed my arms and waited.

"ONLY THE BEST PERSON EVER! Besides my boyfriend!" Misa squealed, hugging Light, who looked as if he would rather be anyplace else. "Kira rids the world of the evil people and protects the good people!"

"Depending on your definition of good." Ryuzaki added, as an afterthought to Misa's declaration.

"I think we need to give Max a sturdy definition of who Kira is. It's not her fault for not knowing. We can't be up to date on everything." Light said reasonably, brushing back his glossy brown bangs. "Lots of criminals have been dying from heart attacks, and we're pretty sure there's one person killing them. That person is called Kira, and Kira won't hesitate to kill anyone who stands in his or her way either."

_Really_ strange. At the same time, being around anybody who can kill people with a heart attack gave me the creeps. Sounds like someone who's trying to take over the world to me.

"That sounds like a very impassioned description." Ryuzaki noted, chewing his thumb absently.

"Only because you're trying to convince yourself that I am Kira!" Light said furiously. "Which I'm not!"

"The probability that you are Kira is increasing…" Ryuzaki said blandly.

"Ryuzaki, how many times must I prove to you that I am not Kira?" Light replied earnestly.

"You have never proved anything of the sort."

"Ryuzaki!"

"Let's not fight," Misa said uncertainly. "Ryuzaki, I don't think that Max is Kira."

"I'm sure you'd be the last to know Kira's true identity." Ryuzaki said mildly, and I thought I saw a hint of a smile at Misa's reaction.

"No! I'd be the first to know! I know things!"

"Know things you do." Ryuzaki answered. "But very few things, too."

I was desperately itching to get out of there, but the truth hit me; where would I go? I couldn't fly, my wing was injured, and I had no idea where I was except that I was somewhere in Japan—and the Flock was probably far off.

Ryuzaki turned his searching gaze on me. "Max. I need to talk with you."

"Whatever you're going to say, you can say it now."

"These are…delicate matters. As in a matter of your life or death."

Reluctantly, I followed him out the door. If it came down to it, I was pretty sure I could hold my own in a fight with him, and I've had plenty of experience dealing with people who think they're evil and brilliant enough to take over the world.

It was only later that I found out that for Kira, evil and brilliant was definitely an understatement.


	3. I Steal L's Candy

**Chapter 3: Max Steals L's Candy**

"This is pretty high-tech." I said, looking around at the building we were in. We had passed through who-knows-how-many levels of security, and I was feeling pretty impressed. However, it felt _way_ too cold.

"Yes." Ryuzaki answered, stirring his coffee. "Would you like some coffee too?"

"No."

"Hm. I suppose I will give you some anyway, simply to be civil." He set a cup of coffee in front of me and proceeded to pour an entire packet of what I assumed was sugar into the swirling brown liquid.

I could not have dreamed of a less appetizing beverage had I tried.

"What makes you think I like that much sugar in my coffee?" I said, narrowing my eyes.

"Nothing." Ryuzaki answered. "I simply find sugared coffee energizing and uplifting to the soul. And now, Max, I feel you should listen very carefully."

"Why? Because sugared coffee is a terrible idea?" I asked recklessly.

"Because I know you have wings." Ryuzaki replied, adding heaps of sugar to his coffee. He carefully considered the pile of sweets heaped before him on the table. "I also have a very good idea of who shot you from the sky with a sniper."

I was instantly on my feet. "What do you know?" I said fiercely.

"Much more than you think. Calm yourself. I can't tell you everything unless I know you can be trusted."

I sat down abruptly, trying to not concentrate on Ryuzaki dumping more and more sugar into his coffee. "Isn't that a little too much sugar?"

"Compensates for sleep." Ryuzaki answered. "Now. Maximum Ride."

I couldn't suppress an intake of breath as I felt the goosebumps rise on my arms. He knew my full name?

"I have several theories about Kira's identity. Firstly, I believe Light is most likely Kira. Secondly, I believe victims can be killed only when certain information is obtained about them. Thirdly, I believe you may be one of the few he cannot kill."

"Hang on. Who are _you_? Why do you even _care_?"

Ryuzaki shook his head. "I can see this is going to be a long conversation. Try to bear with me as I explain. Would you trust me if I told you I was the three greatest detectives in the world?"

"Not even." I returned. "That just means you're _crazy_."

"Mm. Perhaps I am. Before we proceed, I would like to tell you this; neither Misa nor Light can be trusted. Take utmost care with your words when speaking with them. Let no details of this conversation slip."

"What makes you think I'm going to stick around?"

"By the end of our talk, I believe you'll stay. I do not believe you will betray my trust either. I am usually right." Ryuzaki's coffee had become a muddled lump of sugar with coffee. I grimaced as he carefully aligned a castle of sugar cubes next to his coffee cup.

Well, if I wasn't going to eat that odd lump of suspicious coffee sugar, I might as well eat one of those sweets. I reached out and managed to grab a heaping handful. Luckily, my movement was too quick for Ryuzaki's slap to reach my hand before I had popped one into my mouth.

"No!" Ryuzaki said fiercely, moving the pile of sweets to the other side of the table. "_NO. No one touches my sweets_."

"I just did."

"We are losing time. Do. Not. Touch. My. Food. Just because I offer you sugar in your coffee does not mean you can eat my sweets."

"Shouldn't we be talking about more serious matters than candy?"

"I know of no matter more serious than candy. Let us continue...allow me to introduce myself as the greatest detective in the world. You should be grateful; I do not share that information with everybody." He ate another one of his sweets, and I did so as well with one of the pieces of candy that I had snatched. He shot me a cross look.

"My top priority is catching Kira and bringing him to justice. Forgive the relative lack of ceremony; we must be brief. You are an avian mutant with wings with enhanced vision, strength and agility. As of now, you cannot fly; I suspect regaining this ability may take a while. Perhaps we may be useful to one another."

"Useful how?" I said, disliking his idea already. Someone who knew this much was definitely someone to watch out for. "I just want to leave."

"Precisely. You wish to leave so you may be reunited with the rest of your…little group of avian mutant buddies. I believe you call it the 'flock'. I have details about them that you currently do not."

"Where are they?"

"I shall tell you after you help me."

"I don't want to help you!"

"I'm afraid we have reached an impasse. However, time may be running out. It seems you have powerful enemies, Maximum. I would consider you lucky to have the world's greatest detective on your side."

"What happened to Fang?" I asked, not bothering to draw in a breath.

"Fang…ah, well, you must agree to the Terms and Conditions, as I would like to call it, of our agreement." Ryuzaki drank his sugar-coffee medley while I mercifully looked away.

"I'm not agreeing to anything if I don't know exactly what it says." I said, looking him directly in the eye. It was way too cold in here, anyway, and for some reason I was having difficulty breathing. "Not a chance."

"Really?" Ryuzaki asked. "Are you sure? Even if you are in danger of dying in the next three minutes from poison? You _are _displaying all of the symptoms, you know."

"POISON?"


	4. Not Blackmail At All

**Chapter 4: Not Blackmail At All**

"I have learned from my research that you have...ah, yes. An expiration date, printed quite conveniently on the back of your neck, which serves to end your life and ensure that you cause no more trouble. Have you ever wondered exactly how the expiration dates work? It's quite ingenious! I believe yours is sometime today. Forgive me, I might have exaggerated in regards to 'three minutes,' but the possibility is high that your death will occur soon."

"So…I'm going to die?" I blurted, unable to reconcile myself with the thought. _Fang. What's he going to do without me?_

"Most likely." Ryuzaki said indifferently. "I am, however, in possession of the antidote."

For a moment I remained speechless, but managed to speak again. "Just _what_ poison is this, anyway?"

Ryuzaki shook his head. "Now why would I tell you? Too much information clutters the mind."

"Blackmail." I breathed. "I know what this is. You're trying to blackmail me into working for you."

"I am simply trying to reach a solution agreeable to both of us, Max."

"Well, being poisoned doesn't sound very agreeable to me."

"Hm. Do you have any other ideas? Or perhaps you would like me to explain to you the details of your impending death?"

"I'm not interested in hearing an account of my death!" I snapped angrily, chills running down my spine. "Now, give me the antidote!"

"Do you agree to help me in my endeavors?" Ryuzaki asked slowly.

I was ready to murder him. He was so _calm_, knowing that I could die at any minute. "YES, you blackmailing jerk. Fine."

"Are you sure?" Ryuzaki questioned, one more time.

"YES. Now, where is it?" I demanded.

Ryuzaki gave me a long, crafty smile before answering.

"In your coffee."

Words cannot describe the lethal look I used to stare him down before finishing the contents of the cup.

"Hm." Ryuzaki hummed. "An opportunity for me to observe the famed eating skills of an avian mutant."

"What is this to you?" I said furiously. "Some kind of joke?"

"No…." Ryuzaki said lightly. "Simply that you might find similar company with a mass murderer."

"What in the world are you talking about?"

"Few possess epic eating skills. You and Light are among that small elite. I, sadly, have resigned myself to wolf down sweets at every opportunity. My presence in that company is at best dubious."

He was making absolutely no sense, so I ignored him. "Now, tell me what I can do so I can get out of here."

"This will require skills you are not familiar with. You are accustomed to direct combat, not to this game of lies. One misstep, and we are all dead. One of the best agents I ever had—an expert in capoeira—lost her life due to what I suspect may be cunning tactics employed by Kira."

I sighed and folded my arms. "What if _you're_ Kira?"

"You would have been dead already." Ryuzaki said quietly. "I appreciate your paranoia. It is not unnecessary. Although I suspect Kira cannot kill you, it is unwise to make assumptions."

"So far you haven't actually _said_ anything." I said, becoming more and more frustrated. "Are you going to ask me to 'save the world' again? Because I've already had enough of that for a lifetime."

"I am not asking you to save the world, although you may end up doing so." Ryuzaki replied. "I am simply asking you…to save your _Flock_. The only way you can do that…is to eliminate Kira."

"Fair enough." I said brusquely. "Now, let's get on with it."

"Before I share the details of my plan, I have something to tell you." Ryuzaki regarded me with a somewhat playful smile, which I was sure to return with a scowl.

"Call me L."


	5. I Forget About Saving the World

**Chapter 5: I Forget About Saving The World**

"So!" Misa said, fluttering around like a small, excited squirrel. "What did you think of Light?"

"He's very nice." I said flatly, even though I knew she meant well.

"MAX! Are you planning to steal my boyfriend?" Misa asked, hands on her hips angrily.

Really, Misa? Didn't you hear the sarcasm?

"Don't think I could if I tried." I said wryly to myself. "Anyway, Misa, you should probably go back to your modeling shoot. Photo shoot. Photo modeling shoot. Whatever."

"I wish I had wings. Your wings are _so_ pretty." Misa said wistfully, this topic coming out of nowhere. "Really, really pretty."

"Ah…most people don't think so. They aren't built to be pretty, anyway."

"I SHOULD SIGN YOU UP FOR A FASHION SHOW, MAX!"

"NO, MISA, NO!"

Eventually I managed to convince her that enlisting me in a fashion show was much less important than her own fashion show obligations, and she rushed out the door, promising that she would return soon and make me into a superstar.

Nice try, Misa.

With a sigh, I flopped back onto my pillows. I _hate_ being cooped up like this, especially because of some very bad experiences with places like _the School_. What had I just gotten myself into? All I cared about was protecting the Flock, I reminded myself. L hadn't really told me much of anything, and he seemed like the slippery type. Within a day, I'd been shot at, poisoned, almost dead, met at least three insane people, and was probably about to lose my marbles myself.

"Great." I muttered.

"So I finally found you."

"FANG!" I couldn't stop a sharp gasp as I noticed him, leaning against the wall and blending in with the shadows like nobody's business. Honestly, he probably has some kind of magical power he's keeping hidden from the rest of us.

"Yep."

He looked as Fang-like as ever, meaning like an avenging death angel, as he shifted his hands in his pockets and held my gaze.

"How long have you been listening?" I asked, looking around surreptitiously to make sure nobody saw him.

"Just arrived. Let's get you out of here." Fang said brusquely, striding over.

I hesitated. Hadn't L told me that he had details about the Flock that I didn't? What was going on? Besides, I couldn't fly, and we'd look awfully silly running down the street.

"Where's the Flock?"

Fang looked up, and I saw a genuine flash of fear in his dark eyes. That alarmed me. A _lot_. "I don't know," he said. "All I know is that I've found you."

"I met someone who said he had details about the Flock I didn't." I said, my voice lowering into a whisper. "Lots of stuff happened, but long story short...uh..."

Fang watched while I fidgeted.

"Okay," I blurted. "So I've been enlisted to help catch a serial killer who can apparently kill people without touching them. It turns out that there's a high probability that I've actually met him, too."

"What?" Fang said dubiously. "Since when are you a detective? Weren't you supposed to be saving the world?"

"Not last time I checked. Anyway, now you have to tell me what's happened. Where's the Flock?"

"They were shot down." Fang took a deep breath. "Somewhere nearby. I couldn't find any of them, and I knew I had to come after you first."

"All right. Now, let me tell you what's occurred so far."

"No. Let's get out."

"Fang, I can't _fly_." I half-whispered, ruefully shaking out my wing. "It sucks, I know. How are we going to get out?"

Fang inspected my wing carefully, and then nodded resolutely.

"I'll carry you." Fang said, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

Despite the slight quickening of my heartbeat, which I _of course_ had to be acutely aware of (damn hormones!), I thought for a moment and then shook my head. "Fang, where are we going to go?"

"We'll do our usual thing." Fang said, brow furrowed. "You know. Save the world and stuff."

After I had finished telling him the ludicrous tale of L and his sugared coffee - and the expiration date as well - Fang took a step back. "I don't want to get mixed up in that."

"But the Flock! We don't know where they are, and—"

"We don't need his help. Let's just leave, find the rest of the flock, and get back to saving the world."

"Fang—"

"Max—"

"I really don't think we should leave."

"Fine." Fang said, face cast in shadows. "I'll just go. You can play at being detective if you want."

"No, it's not like that—I know it isn't—all I want to do is find the Flock."

"I tell you, we can find them by ourselves. Why trust in the first person you meet?"

"Apparently he's the greatest detective in the world. Not like I'd believe something stupid like that, but he knows _way_ too much about us for it to be a fluke. Even the expiration dates. Fang, trust me."

"I've always trusted you, Max. Now you're the one who's not trusting me."

That last statement hit me hard. I've always have and always will trust my right-hand man. Was I really being that much of an insensitive jerk? I paused, unsure of how to proceed.

"Fang, you know I've got complete faith in you. I have an idea. Why don't we divide and conquer? I'll find out more if I can, and you'll be able to go look for the rest of them as well. The moment we're all together again, we're out of this place. I promise."

Fang nodded, and the tension disappeared as I caught the trace of his smile. "I'll come for you later. Remain outdoors where I can spot you if you can."

With that, he was gone, not even having waited for a farewell.

* * *

Not far away, a certain detective was hunched over a computer screen, bright white light harsh on his pale skin. Absorbed in listening to a recording, he balanced a stack of sugar cubes on a spoon as each addition made the tower wobble more and more precariously.

"Hidden in plain sight, I see," The detective said to himself thoughtfully. "This should be an interesting business indeed."

**[A/N]** A couple of things I want to say (or ask). One, we are branching off onto a completely alternate timeline in terms of the Kira case. Two, let's forget about any possible language barriers. Three, what about pairings, which would you prefer? Four, reviews are always amazing!


	6. I Get Mistaken For A Death God

**Ch 6: I Get Mistaken For a Death God**

I really needed to get out of this hospital place. Maybe I should have gone with Fang instead...but what about this killer that's supposedly going to get us all? What about the rest of the Flock? I needed answers, and I had the sneaking feeling that there were lots of other things that L wasn't telling me. His plan had sounded pretty smart and stuff, so I just nodded like I understood.

"Are you feeling better?" Misa asked, hands on her hips, snapping me out of my thoughts. "Wow, you look really tired! Are you okay?"

"Huh?"

"Anyway, I should tell you that you can stay at my place once you feel better! It'll be so cool! We can be like best friends forever, and I can talk with you when I get lonely! How's that sound?"

I was pretty sure that Misa and I wouldn't _ever_ get to the stage of best buddies forever, but I _did_ need a place to stay. Not need, exactly - I could always take off with Fang and try to find the Flock - but as long I tried to keep up the pretense of being normal, Misa's offer would be useful.

"Sounds good," I began, but Misa quickly interrupted.

"But you CANNOT go on my dates with Light! Ryuzaki is always stalking us," she pouted, "and we get absolutely _no_ privacy whatsoever."

"Calm down, I don't really want to-"

"And I'd never let you come along, even if you wanted to! Everything that's mine is yours, except for my darling Light!"

"Misa, what makes you think I'm going to steal your boyfriend?"

She let out a deep breath. "All right. But you'd better not even look at him," she threatened, "or I'll kick you out! For good!"

The thought made me chuckle. I'm no stranger to living on the streets. In fact, living at Misa's place might even be _more_ uncomfortable than sleeping on the sidewalk. But she was kind of entertaining.

"I won't even think of it. I promise."

"I'm going to call Light to see if he can come pick me up so we can go on a date!" Misa said, her mind flying off on a spectacular tangent. "He has to come! He's refused to go on a date with me for _so_ long, and I just hate it. Light always says that he's busy! He's not cheating on me, is he?"

I wasn't really sure if she wanted an answer, but she whipped out her phone in another half-second and evidently started calling her boyfriend.

"Light!"

"Hi." He sounded weary. Having a girlfriend like Misa isn't easy, I'll bet.

"Can you pick me up so we can go on a date!" That wasn't even a question. Poor guy. "Let's go on a date!"

A loud sigh. "Misa-"

"Please! In the least come by and see me!"

"Fine, but only for a couple of minutes."

Misa proceeded to tell me all about her latest fashion show while I scanned the room for some food. I hadn't eaten in a while, and stealing L's sweets wasn't really a good way to keep myself full. No, I needed food ASAP.

"Misa, do you have any snacks on you?" I asked, interrupting her rant about how she kept on tripping in those designer heels. "Please?"

"Of course!" Misa smiled, reaching into her purse. I could hardly contain my excitement, but why was she taking so long? Couldn't she just give me the chips or cookies, or even _anything _would do -

"Would you like some 50-calorie lettuce bars?"

"Haha, very funny-" I began, but then stared at the suspicious-looking green sticks she was holding with horror.

"Those exist?" I demanded. "How can you eat a 50-calorie lettuce bar? Why would you even want to put that anywhere near your mouth?"

She opened her mouth, but soon changed her mind about answering me as her boyfriend walked through the door. Instead, she squealed with joy. Light was tossing an apple up and down with one hand, and I wondered if he'd ever stopped to think about how odd that looked.

"Oh, it's you again," Light smiled evenly at me. "How are you doing?"

Misa shot me a glare that could have scorched through anything. I scowled back at her. "Fine," I muttered in Light's direction.

Then, remembering what L had told me, I straightened, put a normal expression on my face, and smiled back, as difficult as that was.

* * *

"I was told you named yourself," L had said, eating his pile of sweets happily. "Meaning that you and your little group of avian mutants may be immune to Kira's primary attack."

"Please explain what you're saying before I steal_ all_ of your candy."

L gave me a sour look. "As I was saying, I believe that this killer must have access to your true name in order to kill. Yours, however, is a self-given name. I have given considerable thought to the fact that your true name may be stored on the database of one of those laboratories, but in order to access it, Kira must know that you are an avian mutant. This information must be kept from him at all costs."

"I'm going to take one of those chocolate mints over there in about forty-five seconds, just so you know."

"I'm _explaining_. Your name may provide you the needed protection; and your status as 98% human, 2% animal is especially intriguing." Suddenly, L's gaze swiveled off into the distance. "Hm, how interesting. Can Kira kill animals? Animals with names? Without names? And, if animals cannot be killed, what point does a creature become _human_ enough to be killed by Kira?"

"Aha!" I said triumphantly, scooting forward to scoop up a generous pile of candy. "Gotcha!"

L encircled what remained of his candy in his arms. "If you value my cooperation, Max-"

"What? I'm hungry."

* * *

So, this guy was apparently a killer? I'd thought L was joking when he said I had to treat Light like my best friend, but maybe not. Not only was I definitely _not_ Light's best friend, but Misa would come after me with scissors in the middle of the night if I did what L had said.

"Misa-misa has something to tell you," Misa smiled, wrapping her arms around Light. "Did you know that Max is actually a bird-girl?"

"Really?" Light's eyes narrowed. "Does this mean she has wings?"

"Ah, um, no!" I shouted, much too loudly. "No wings. Nothing to see here. Right, moving along. So, whatcha got that apple for, Light?"

Misa continued, nodding frantically at Light. Why couldn't that girl just be quiet? "I saw her wings! Ohmigosh, they're so _pretty_, and she _has_ to be part of a fashion show! I keep on telling her to be proud of her beautiful wings, but she just tries to hide them and it makes me sad!"

Light smiled, all charm and innocence. "A bird-girl? I'd wonder what your wings looked like. They must be spectacular."

"Ah, no! Don't listen to Misa!" My stomach suddenly growled, and I said the first thing that came to mind. "Food? Can I have food? Anybody?"

"Would you like an apple?" Light enquired politely, holding out the apple for me to eat. He gave a quick glance sideways, as if conversing with someone, but soon his blank, well-meaning gaze landed on me.

The smart part of me said _No, he's a serial killer!_ and the hungry side of me said something like _Screw it, I'm hungry_. So I reached out to grab the apple and began to eat. The apple was actually pretty good, but pizza would have been more like it._  
_

Light was watching me, as if considering a new possibility he hadn't seen before. "What?" I demanded, mouth full with apple. "You gave me the apple, and I'm hungry!"

"Oh, nothing," Light shrugged quickly. "Just wondering something. Do you like apples, Max?"

"Sure," I answered, not thinking much of the question. The real problem was that Light _knew_ I was an avian mutant. He could hack into the database of the research labs, and find the name I had given myself, and then, L had told me, it would all be over. Or something like that. I had to tell L about this, and fast.

* * *

"The wings," Light said under his breath, as he strode along the streets, Misa babbling obliviously in his wake. "The apple. Can they take a human form? Have I unknowingly touched another Death Note? I wouldn't have guessed. Is it possible?"

Beside him, the death-god watched with luminous red eyes and growing amusement. "I cannot tell you the answer. Only you can decide."


End file.
